When I talk about self love it’s hard not associate it with the wider culture. Growing up, as a young woman in a western society it was hard not to borrow and be influenced by what was sold by popular culture. It was hard for me to formulate my own benchmark because since birth I was given one. A benchmark of beauty, a benchmark of success, a benchmark of social roles, rules and norms…the list goes on. It’s only when I got older and a little bit wiser that I started to think that, maybe, I had bought into a big lie.
The problem with setting benchmarks is that they’re usually unattainable and especially when they are set by a large body of people either driven by money or power or both. My qualms lie in the fact that because of these accepted stereotypes and guidelines of how to look and live your life, peoples lives and their self love have been terribly effected.
I have struggled my whole life to love myself. Constantly told by the media, by some of my family and sometimes my friends that who I was, wasn’t in fact good enough. Even when you become a little bit older and little bit wiser it’s hard to break down those opinions and see them for what they were/are – insecurities of other people; insecurities of a culture. Not insecurities of your own. However, the sad fact of the matter is that sometimes these insecure opinions become your own objection to yourself and when that happens it becomes very hard to undo. The biggest problem is that focusing on the exterior will only lead to a bitter and sad interior. Being happy has little to do with whats on the outside. Yes, being healthy is important but health comes from within. True love for ourselves and for others comes from what is inside us. When you concentrate on what you look like on the outside, you will always feel unfulfilled. Be true to your spirit and everything else will be as it should.
They key is to find your spiritual life, in whatever form that may be. ‘The way’, ‘The dreaming’, ‘The enlightenment’, ‘The path’, ‘Being re-born’, – whatever you call it, finding that and digging deeper into it. For me, I am only at the beginning of my spiritual journey. I don’t have enough self love at the moment and I am working on it. Life without self love will constantly be an uphill battle and it will effect the other relationships and parts of your life that are incredibly important to you.
For me, I know I want to be a world worker. To share my creativity and abundance with others and to learn from others who are also sharing their passion, their heart with the world. I’m not there yet. I still have a lot of insecurities, memories and hurt to let go of but I’m taking it one day at a time. I’m going to try and live my dreaming and find a place of acceptance – to reach a place of healing.