Indeterminate state.

It’s easy to feel organized in college.  You have a desired path. You have to study to pass classes and finish classes to get your degree. You have an outcome on the horizon. The hard part comes not when you are studying but rather when you become a graduate. And here I am, a graduate traveling around Europe trying to discover what it is I want to do, where it is I want to be, how I am going to contribute to humanity and the rest of the world….the ways in which I can institute change.

Traveling is both brilliant and exhausting. Outside of college, the times that I have learned the most are the times spent on the road. Not only am I interacting with different communities and different cultures but I am also learning patience and tolerance. I find that a lot of traveling time is spent waiting. Waiting at airports, waiting at train stations, waiting for taxi’s, buses, people, waiting to meet up with friends…waiting. And a lot of the time is also spent carrying large backpacks, wheeling suitcases, holding parcels, lifting bags, shoving them into small compartments, hotel rooms, hostels, cupboards, cars. Let me assure you, I’ve built up some great arm muscles from lugging large bags around. So whilst traveling is amazing and one of the best things a human could do for personal elevation, it can be all consuming. It’s not all French champagne and truffles. It can be really tiring. But I think all of the experiences blend well together. All of the tiredness, the stress, the laughter, the education, the moments, the organizing, the last minute changes, the people; all of these things culminate into one amazing experience. It lends itself to nothing but growth.

So, what I have been motivated to do thus far in my post college career is trying to find  a way of story telling, my own and others and the two best medians I know how to convey those stories is through the written word and the lens. Although I am still a beginner in the ways of the camera, I am determined to learn. Stimulated by the amazing photographers I have around me as well as the necessity for anthropologists to collect and pass on stories, I find myself at a new point in my life. No longer longing to do my masters because it seemed like an easy next step and another two years of not having to plan my life. I actually find myself wanting to do work, to get involved, to put myself out there, to feel and use the fear inside of me and convert it into positivity. Alter the vague into something tangible. Whilst I may be in limbo, I have never felt so sure of myself. Here I am, standing at the precipice and about to embark on the rest of my life, finally.





1 Comment »

  1. good on you mel! your blog is always such a great read and your photos are of the highest standard. glad to hear you’ve found a bit of clarity recently. keep up the awesomeness!

    Comment by mikey — September 10, 2009 @ 4:09 pm

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